I'm in a glass case of emotion.

I'm searching for jobs while listening to Irish jigs and sitting in the glass room at the library. People stare as they walk by. Weeks ago, I would have been a usual sight - someone appearing to study. Now that school is out around here, the librarian looked at us quizzically when we requested the room. Now I'm sitting here by myself pretending that I'm applying for jobs.

Job searching is the last thing I want to do right now. My heart's not jumping at any of the prospects I find and the last thing I want is a dead end job that I only take to make money. After this year, that would kill me. Idealist.org, the website that's becoming my best friend and worst enemy, shows me mostly development jobs. I've been there and done that. Never again. Maybe I'm being too picky.

I want to work in Ohio. I'm targeting my search to the Cleveland area, but there's this tiny part of me that wants to throw it all out the window and just go overseas. I've always wanted to live and work in another country...at least for a year. But, it's probably not the right now. Not the right time to pack up and move out of the country. I suppose I don't have to find a job in the Cleveland area - or even OH for that matter. That's just where I envision myself living and working. I could apply for the americorps position in the Cleveland area that looks interesting. But, it's not exactly what I want to do. I would welcome a job in refugee or immigration services.