Ignorance

Caveat: My family eats fish for dinner every Friday. During Lent, we usually go out for fish. Last night took us to Das Dutch Haus, a family style restaurant about 15 minutes from my house. Last night, we were seated furthest corner of the back room – behind a table of a family with 2 children approx. 4 and 4 yrs. old and next to a lady (who looked to be in her late 40s) and her husband. The younger of the 2 kids was a boy, and was obviously adopted – probably from Latin America. The 2 children were behaving like children – annoying each other, growing restless while waiting for dinner, over sitting in their seats, etc. At one point, the little girl was pulling on a tapestry that was hanging on the wall and teasing her little brother while their mother was trying to get them to sit down.

40 yr old woman (talking loudly): All some people do is bitch at their kids.

[at this point you could hear a pin drop in the back room]

mother of 2 kids: Excuse me?

woman: Why don’t you try loving your kids. All you do is bitch at them.

mother: I love my kids. You have no idea what you’re talking about. You should mind your own business.

woman: I’ve raised my kids and have done a better job than you have. At least I’m grateful for my kids. You’re not grateful for your kids.

[picture me sitting there with my mouth open ready to tackle the obnoxious woman]

mother: You have no idea how grateful I am for my children.

There was a long pause in the restaurant. A woman from another table came over to give the mother a hug and tell her that her kids were beautiful and that she’s doing a great job with them. The obnoxious lady promptly picks up the phone and calls who we are to assume is one of her kids and talks loudly to the person about what she should be doing and how she should be watching her brother, etc. At the end of the conversation, she loudly says, “I love you.” All show, I believe. By now, this woman’s just staying to make people mad. She finished eating and had her check. She started up again – even louder than the first time.

“You know, you can always tell when kids are adopted because they never behave. They’re just brats and should stay in the countries where they belong. We don’t want no one different here.”
“She’s just abusing her kids. You can tell. She’s abusive and doesn’t love her kids.”
“Maybe if that kid wasn’t different he’d behave. She’s abusive.”

On and on it went. Her running commentary and complete ignorance was ruining my dinner. At one point, I said rather loudly, “You know, some people just don’t know love when they see it.” She just glared at me.

The obnoxious woman and her husband finally left. She muttered something to the woman and her family as they passed the table. As soon as she left the room, the mother burst into tears. Her kids rushed to give her big hugs. People from all over the room kept going up to the table to encourage her, show her love, etc.

As we left, my aunt and I both stopped by the table to let her know that her kids were adorable and that she shouldn’t listen to the ignorance of one person. She thanked us through her tears.

I was raging mad when we left the restaurant.

I can’t believe the ignorance of some people. I know that racism still exists where I live. It’s the first time in recent memory that I’ve witnessed someone act that vile. Parents discipline their kids as they see fit. Now, my dad would have dragged me out of the restaurant if I was running around and given me a talking to in the parking lot, but that’s just my dad. All kids deserve love. My kudos to those parents for opening their arms to a child through adoption and loving their kids. They certainly weren’t lacking in love.

And to the ignorant woman: I can’t believe you. Where do you get off thinking that you’re the authority on parenting? Don’t pass judgment on ANYONE. It’s not becoming. Open your eyes and mind to the world. Don’t be racist. I hope you regret what you said to that mother.

a little pick-me-up

One of my favorite people in the world forwarded me this video at the end of last week. I was having a bad day at work, and it made me smile. I came across it in my email tonight and sent it to some of my friends.

confession

I am addicted to HGTV. House Hunters, Holmes on Homes, My First Place... you name it, I watch it.

I yell at the people who won't buy a house because they don't like the color of pain in one room. (That's why we have Home Depots where you can buy new paint). Or, the people who complain because the refrigerator, freezer, and stove are white and they prefer stainless steel. Um, our fridge is older than I am. My ultimate favorite people are those who complain that the walk-in closet isn't quite big enough to fit both the wife's clothes/shoes AND the husband's. Now, I have a lot of clothes, but not that many.

After watching all these shows, I'm feel like I'm ready to search for my own house.

Haiti

I know someone that's lived in Haiti for a couple years now. She's still there - working, helping, serving, giving of herself. When asked when she will come home, she says "There's too much work to do here."

Since the earthquake, I haven't been able to get Haiti out of my mind. I think that if I had the opportunity to go, I would. Nevermind the fact that I am not a doctor or a nurse. I was talking about it with a couple people after church today. I can't imagine having nothing - no change of clothes, no underwear, nothing.

This video is about the town before the earthquake. The person I know is based in this town.

self evaluation

I finally got around to filling out my self evaluation at work today. More like I was forced to because my coworker turned her's in this morning. Her anniversary was last month - mine was Aug. 27th. Granted, my boss held onto mine until January, but it was still time.

I had a hard time giving myself 4s (the highest level) across the board because they signal perfection. I'm far from perfect. Yes, I work my butt off, but I still make mistakes. And, I'm a brutally honest person. That probably hurts me in a self evaluation. I don't want them thinking I have a huge ego even though I probably deserve 4s across the board. I ended up giving myself one 3 and the rest 4s.

I've been utterly exhausted this week. I'm trying to chalk it up to the fact that I ran around all weekend and only had about 12 hours of sleep over the span of the entire weekend. (I usually average 2x that on the weekend). I don't know what it is. I think my bed is calling me early tonight.

kick in the pants

I spent my day on a retreat in Cleveland with 2 of my favorite sisters. It was all about making decisions - something that I really needed. I have a couple big decisions looming about so it was nice to take some time to focus on them (and other things).




Before lunch, we had quiet time. I had just finished telling people about my tendency to become complacent. I sat down at a table looking out onto the street and started writing in my journal. When I looked up, I noticed this sign:

God really does have a sense of humor and a way of kicking me in the butt to get moving.

And it's March

The Circus apparently is coming to town. Each morning, as I'm racing (and usually running dangerously close to being late) to work, I pray that I won't catch the train. The Ringling Bros./Barnum & Bailey train greeted me this morning. It stopped at the railroad crossing for a good 20 minutes. And I was going to be early this morning! How rude.

I told one of my coworkers this morning that I've actually never been to the circus. She was shocked. My family isn't exactly circus going folks and I hate clowns. It works out for the best. She was all set to call to find out if they still had tickets. Apparently I'm missing out.

There's still about a foot of snow in my yard, but spring is just around the corner. The sun finally decided to show it's face today. This little tree in my yard is getting ready to bloom. I can feel the winter tiredness gradually starting to leave my bones.

I feel like I closed my eyes and it was March. February was a blur of activity. I told my dad this tonight while we were eating dinner. His response: "Well, it is the shortest month of the year."

Thank you Captain Obvious. Yes, I realize that it's a shorter month, but it still went fast. I feel like I lost the entire month.